How you crush an interview

The setup:

five employees, one room, round table, everyone has a computer, it’s about an hour long:

I wasn’t nervous, exactly. It was more of an anxious excited feeling where your heartbeat is slightly accelerated. I have no idea how Justin Timberlake feels before a concert, but I bet he has a similar feeling to what I felt.

The recruiter asks me to come back to the room, a small room with open windows that let you see towards the main floor. It was a tech company that looked just how you would think a tech company looks like. Clean, polished, and a relaxed environment with algorithms, or whatever written on the transparent windows.

I take a seat. One guy sitting there doesn’t even look at me. I’m not phased. I say, “Are you here for the interview as well?” He says yeah. I sit down and make myself as relaxed as possible. Next, a group of four other guys come in. My demeanor and inner thoughts were so focused on maintaining a relaxed pose that I almost forget to stand up and greet the interviewers.

One guy who looked like the head of the HR department was probably the one who was most friendly, and easy to talk to. It’s kind of hard to hold a casual conversation when they type away furiously at a keyboard noting everything you say.

It starts off pretty cliché and they ask to tell them about myself. I ramble an interesting sentence where I touch on playing chess and doing comedy. Their eyes light up and a little excitement was shown in their voices. Surprisingly, they ask me to tell a joke. It’s not like I prepared for such occasion but I had one deep in my memory that was chuckle-proof. It’s a long winded joke about how three guys try to get into heaven. After my punchline, they laugh pretty hard to my surprise.

After that, it was a piece of cake. The interviewees laughed at my stories, had interest in my answers, and some friendly banter was in play. I nailed it.

I was so confident that I went out to eat with my buddy to some bar. There was no indication that I had guaranteed a job, only brief optimistic comments from the recruiter if you paid close enough attention.

The email I received today was glorious. “Hey, I have some good news for you. Let me know when is a good time to call you”

I reply, “I am always available if it’s good news.” Ryan Gosling couldn’t be smoother. I was on a roll.

Anyways, I got the job!

A Little Confidence

Yes, again. I had a bad day at work.

What set me off wasn’t even that big of a deal. It was just some dude kind of yelling, almost bullying. He didn’t say anything mean to me, nor did he ever swear. As a matter of fact, he always reiterated that he wasn’t mad at me, personally. I think the reason I got so upset was because it was only a fraction of what I might experience in the future.

I went to my favorite coffee shop. A sense of anxiety draped over me, I decided to call my mom. I don’t know why. She doesn’t really understand the person I am, nor knows the fraction of the thoughts I have. Yet, I called her. I excused myself from the lobby and went to an empty hallway. Between a few tears streaming down my face, and sipping on an Italian soda, I vented. My mom was extremely worried, she said she wanted me to come home. It was a nice thing for my mom to say. However, I declined and said I wanted to sit on the big comfy couch and explore the internet a while.

The morning after, I called my sister because the dread was still hanging near me. My sister didn’t give the most helpful advice either, she is more about positive thinking and just being a happy person. That shit doesn’t work for me. I can’t just think to be happy and then be happy. How does that fix any underlying issues??? Still, my sister was supportive of any decision I would make. I was really thinking of just quitting, no two weeks, nor email notice. If I would have gone through it, I doubt there would be any sense of guilt, just a wonderful sensation of freedom. The phone call lasted until I had to go to work.

At work the anxiety feeling set it, knowing I might have to be on the phones again and receive angry people.

It was towards the end of my shift, and my manager decided to put me on phones again. Since I’m training, I need a person by my side to troubleshoot something I can’t do. I took three phone calls and aced it. I knew what I was doing, I was informed, knew the steps, and resolved the issue.

That was it. That was all it took. Just one better day to follow a terrible one. My confidence in myself was stronger.

After a while, I think I figured out why the guy bothered me so much in the beginning. I didn’t know how to do my job. The answers were terrible, I wasn’t “helping the customer”, and I was overwhelmed. Basically, in order for me not to feel shitty, I have to know everything about my job, or at least in a mediocre way. I feel okay now. I don’t feel like it’s the end of the world. I’m still looking for an escape, but now I can not panic about work the night before.